I could do it
Leo whispers to himself
I could just snatch it and run
but why would you even give him the waterbed
he had scissors
bill nye and ken ham
one of the saddest things is when women have internalized misogyny and agree that women are “weak”
is this snake fucking serious
like was that actually fucking necessary
#GirlsCan: Women Empowerment | COVERGIRL | Girls can’t? Yes, they can. Rap, be funny, be off-the-wall, rock, be strong, run the show, make the world a little more easy, breezy and beautiful.
Happy International Women’s Day!
*on a date* so haha tell me more about your dog
Two scientists walk into a bar.
The first scientist says “I’ll have a glass of H2O”
The second scientist says “Who comes into a fucking bar for a drink of water? I’ll have a beer.”
God I love her.
Best line in television ever
when parents tell you not to do the thing but 5 seconds later they do the thing
pizza wasn’t invented until the late 19th century so that means everyone in les mis died before they could try their first pizza and that’s why les mis is such an upsetting story
you know how in musicals the couple will start singing the same song no matter how far apart they are
what if that happened in real life
what if you were just at a restaurant one day and you started rANDOMLY SINGING because your soulmate decided to sing a duet in the shower
"yes, I would like the bacon and eggs breakfast speciAND AT LAST I SEE THE LIGHT, AND IT’S LIKE THE FOG HAS LIFTED."
Humans have a big cluster of dead keratin tendrils growing from our heads and we arrange them in different configurations and worry about whether other people find our keratin tendril arrangements aesthetically pleasing.
we are the cutest scifi species